Jun
22

Three Steps to a Successful Date

By

When you are out on a date, focus on the 1-2-3 steps for dating success:

1. Create a Connection

You have to resonate with your date by developing rapport.  Focus on what you have in common and start a conversation about those items.   If he is into golf, and you are into golf, ask him where he likes to play golf and get him talking about golf.

Stay positive and talk about restaurants, movies, sports and other items you both like. Maybe you both saw an independent film that you can talk about. Don’t talk about previous relationships, what your date does for a living, about their family or delve into religion or politcs.

The objective is to find ways to connect based on common interests. Most people date and marry those who are enough like us that we know we’ll have fun together.

2. Develop Chemistry

Once you have a connection based on common interests, focus on body language. Men not only love it when a women takes the lead in showing him that she’s attracted, but some men can be clueless.  Use small gestures sucy as smiling and looking shyly down at your plate or your glasss. Use your hands to play with any object at hand: your glass, the napkin, a lock of your hair. Whenever a silence falls in your conversation, don’t feel like you have to fill it up. When the time is right, reach over and touch his arm to direct his attention to something. Order an unusual dish  that you can try  together.

3. Show Honesty and Candor

Be more direct as you become comfortable with your date by opening up about more personal topics, like your favorite role models, your funniest dating experiences.   You should be relaxed enough that you feel you can really be yourself.   If you’re attracted to one another, tell your date.  So many dates end badly simply because both parties were too afraid to say or show that they were interested. Tell your date you are having a great time and that he/she is great company.   This way your date knows he’s being given the green light to kiss you or ask you out on another date.

If you aren’t interested, say something like “It’s been nice meeting you, or I had a nice time…… and I wish you the best of luck meeting Mr./Mrs. Right. Maybe we’ll see each other online again.” Or “I don’t feel we resonate on a romantic level but I enjoyed this evening.”  These are polite ways to tell a date that you aren’t interested but that you them the best.

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