Linda Rains,
Match.com
Few things in life can be as intimidating as a first date — especially when
going in blindly, with only a few exchanged emails or telephone calls. Without
a little careful planning, the tension of a first meeting can cause a
potentially compatible couple to spontaneously combust in twenty minutes or
less.
Think about it. You’d never enter a job interview without a little
preparation and attention to detail. Why should love be any different? You
can’t just wing it, or you’re doomed to fail. Strategy counts on love’s
battlefield, too. So pay careful attention to these four basic first-date
moves, and the first introduction could lead to love.
- Make your approach. Swap at least a couple photos before making
plans to meet. Because you’ve got plenty of stress ahead for the evening,
why worry about approaching the wrong person or missing your date entirely?
It’s no shock that most people choose their best shot for a profile and may
look slightly different offline. Be prepared for two problems that may
arise: Mistaken preliminary attraction and many awkward moments spent
scanning the faces of complete strangers. Before you go, make sure you know
your date’s true identity. Give details on how to find each other, reveal
your clothing plans, top your duds with a bright tie or scarf.
- Talk to me. You’ve set aside time to spend with a relative
stranger, so how do you plan to spend it? Talk! Regardless of whether or not
the attraction translates from online to off, be friendly, be attentive and
be inquisitive. Arm yourself with tons of questions about career, hobbies,
family and interests. When your date reciprocates with a query of his or her
own, go out of your way to avoid one-word responses. Don’t be shy; don’t
hold back. You’re there to learn about one another, so open up and start
talking.
- Get down to business. If you’re the type to typically clam up in
the face of potential love, I highly suggest you partake in what I dub the
“distraction date.” At all costs, avoid dinner and drinks. Stay away from
coffee shops, and go nowhere near a quiet park. Save these venues for later
dates when you’ve regained your talent for talk. Instead, try something
sporty like miniature or Frisbee golf, batting cages or bicycling. If not a
jock, try a course in dancing, pottery painting or a trip to the museum.
Keep busy, and your date will never know you’re at a loss for words.
- Focus on the finale. The parting moment can be nearly as
perplexing as the initial meeting. So many thoughts are bound to overwhelm:
Is my date attracted? Did I ramble on too much about work? Was my comment
about current events completely asinine? Push these worries aside for the
moment and simply relax while saying goodbye. Because more than likely, your
date’s got a few self-imposed bothersome thoughts too. If all went well and
no blood was shed, express your interest and be genuine about future
intentions. I’d opt to avoid the first-date kiss. Instead, if the vibe’s
right, go for a quick hug.
Search For Local Singles and make tonight your first date!